Because I didn't step forth and shine in anything, I felt I didn't do anything well. In fact, looking back on it, sports seemed to be such a focus in my household I knew I had no way of ever competing for that limelight due to my inability to be an athlete. I've asked myself many times why I never realized people really aren't created equal in all areas and I've also asked myself why no one ever recognized that I showed promise in some area unrelated to sports. Maybe I wasn't meant to become a famous artist or author, but who knows what could have happened with some early encouragement. Every kid deserves to be made to feel special and to have guidance while seeking out their place in the spotlight.
Shortly after Margie, my childhood best friend and I had reconnected after an 30 plus year hiatus, she showed me a picture she had kept that I had drawn when I was around 11 years old. It appeared to be the head of a Barbie doll. After I got over the shock of her having kept my picture all those years, I slipped once again into wondering why no one ever encouraged me to draw or to do anything creative when I was a kid. Sure, I doodled and dabbled whenever the spirit moved me, but I was never encouraged to continue drawing and I never tried to take it to the next level until June 2012 when I announced to my mother one day that I was going to paint a picture.
I figured how hard could it be especially since I had been able to draw my entire life. My mother just smiled at me and said, "okay!" I'm sure she was expecting my first attempt to be nothing short of a hot mess. To be honest I'm not sure if she even ever noticed I liked to doodle when I was a kid or that her only daughter could draw a straight line without the use of a ruler. I'm sure I was noticed in many ways, but to be honest, I never felt that way. I never had the spotlight except for all the negative things I did.
|This one of my latest paintings|